Thursday, November 4, 2010

this is my expository writing essay click here 

2 comments:

  1. Sema,
    ** When you post an assignment, be more specific about what you are posting. Your post should state your topic. For example, “Why I am Proud to be Canadian”.
    ** Use black for your title in formal writing.
    Use the “tab” button to indent the first sentence of each paragraph.
    Some punctuation issues (add a space after a comma, not before). Some poorly structured sentences. Using the grammar/spell check would fix some of these errors.
    Introduction: Your introduction needs to have more than one sentence.
    Supporting Paragraphs: Your writing would be stronger if you gave more details to support your opinion. You need to write more. In paragraph three you mention “freedom”. It doesn’t fit here.
    Conclusion: The structure of your conclusion is fine but the sentences aren’t complete.
    Overall, you followed the structure well but need to support your ideas better.
    17/25

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  2. Your blog is beautiful, Sema! I love your pictures, and the art! I enjoyed the intergration and I wish you luck on future posts.

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